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Ocelot II

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3. I thought this was going to be The Onion!

Reply to highplainsdem (Original post)

Wed Jul 15, 2026, 02:22 PM

22 hrs ago

Can soldiers get chest hair transplants, too?

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Pete Hegseth says soldiers over age 30 to be screened for testosterone deficiency [View all] highplainsdem 22 hrs ago OP

Hegseth's video announcement: highplainsdem 22 hrs ago #1

Fucking mouth breathing idiot Botany 7 hrs ago #122

Can we also test for testosterone excess? snot 22 hrs ago #2

Clearly they want excess testosterone. live love laugh 12 hrs ago #111

Some soldiers are women. Does Hegseth know that? tblue37 9 hrs ago #118

Not if he can help it. travelingthrulife 3 hrs ago #124

I thought this was going to be The Onion! Ocelot II 22 hrs ago #3

TOTALLY Sounds Like The Onion!! Hegseth Needs To...... ColoringFool 21 hrs ago #37

I am really amazed. No fiction writer could have thought this up. Biophilic 22 hrs ago #4

Sounds like a sci-fi novel of creating Super Warriors underpants 22 hrs ago #17

der Ubermernsch. What else could we expect from a Nazi regime? wnylib 20 hrs ago #47

Next Hegseth will be putting them on meth, like the Nazis did some of their soldiers, especially the Waffen SS. n/t PatrickforB 20 hrs ago #70

There's got to be a gateway purr-rat beauty 19 hrs ago #83

It wasn't just the Waffen SS. It was most of the Army. Aristus 12 hrs ago #110

Next...weighing testicles purr-rat beauty 19 hrs ago #84

I foresee a rise in domestic violence and other complaints around bases. RandySF 22 hrs ago #5

"we're keeping you on the leading edge of lethality" Grokenstein 22 hrs ago #15

Fellow Psychopath To Trump. I Can See Hegseth Thinking...... ColoringFool 21 hrs ago #39

As you wish... ultralite001 20 hrs ago #61

And yet, they are fighting air wars, not ground wars where wnylib 20 hrs ago #51

Exactly..... reACTIONary 20 hrs ago #57

So Hegseth wants military personnel to have wnylib 20 hrs ago #59

That fascist is planning ground troops in Cuba. Justice matters. 13 hrs ago #107

My guess is before elections. wnylib 13 hrs ago #108

That would give all Dem candidates a free publicity gift Justice matters. 12 hrs ago #109

And the women? Bayard 22 hrs ago #6

"War fighters" I'm guessing only Combat Arms. underpants 22 hrs ago #13

he call the all "war fighters" rampartd 21 hrs ago #26

Yes Aviation Pro 21 hrs ago #40

He's already throwing out the women The Blue Flower 20 hrs ago #56

That's what this is all about, kicking the women out KS Toronado 16 hrs ago #90

I imagine women in the service will be deemed to be testosterone-deficient. n/t Mister Ed 22 hrs ago #7

This is how he will bully his way around title nine Walleye 22 hrs ago #10

Does that include the women? I had to look to see if it was the Onion Walleye 22 hrs ago #8

I thought this was the Onion when I first saw it. What an insecure, yet dangerous moron. hlthe2b 22 hrs ago #9

That does sound satisfying. Would make a good scene in a movie. Walleye 22 hrs ago #14

For some reason women will test poorly. Turbineguy 22 hrs ago #11

Yet Biden was encroaching on service members' rights by making COVID vaccines mandatory? hamsterjill 22 hrs ago #12

Hahaha he was pretty sexy...only saw a bit of Beastmaster later on - I saw him in the Original V electric_blue68 11 hrs ago #117

Let him take the test first. llmart 22 hrs ago #16

the thought of his tiny shriveled you-know-whats CharleyDog 21 hrs ago #29

Guy has been the avatar for roid rage for probably a couple decades. Maru Kitteh 18 hrs ago #86

Is Pete a closet case? RandySF 22 hrs ago #18

I thought this would be an Onion article Sequoia 22 hrs ago #19

Pete: a rather small soldier, sitting in a closed dark area, flying a drone that is 1000 miles away,... ashredux 22 hrs ago #20

Be afraid of ICE, be afraid of police, and CharleyDog 21 hrs ago #35

As the "Commander-in-Thief" of our "warriors"... Wuddles440 21 hrs ago #21

Fear not whiskey Pete, all of them will have a higher count than yours. republianmushroom 21 hrs ago #22

Petey seems really obsessed with masculinity... Escape 21 hrs ago #23

Wouldn't flu shots be more effective? dickthegrouch 21 hrs ago #24

Kegsbreath should be tested for intellectual and moral deficiencies. 3catwoman3 21 hrs ago #25

One thing this tells us is that Pete has low testosterone. Scrivener7 21 hrs ago #27

Hell, let's just give them all CharleyDog 21 hrs ago #28

This message was self-deleted by its author littlemissmartypants 19 hrs ago #74

Experimental testing...................... Lovie777 21 hrs ago #30

The top leader should be tested for kacekwl 21 hrs ago #31

From time to time . . . AverageOldGuy 21 hrs ago #32

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb WorseDayEver 21 hrs ago #33

Brilliant scene from a brilliant movie Pinback 20 hrs ago #55

Already mentioned but worth repeating.... test the Commander In Chief? Norrrm 21 hrs ago #34

Zero Testosterone Maninacan 21 hrs ago #36

Warfighters? What would expect from the Secretary of War? patphil 21 hrs ago #38

Well, demanding a certain level of testosterone slightlv 21 hrs ago #41

I'd bet that Hegseth huffs his armpits. Harker 21 hrs ago #42

Republicans are fucking ridiculous. This modern obsession of theirs with testosterone levels is insane as it is Karasu 21 hrs ago #43

Nazis and the Cult of Super-Masculine Soldiers (Must-Read).............. ColoringFool 21 hrs ago #44

Kegsbreath hasn't exactly been subtle about his influences here. Karasu 19 hrs ago #76

"the leading edge of lethality"? Orange Buffoon 20 hrs ago #45

Very poetic line, but as sick as it gets. ColoringFool 20 hrs ago #49

.....The Trump administration has decried the use of hormones in gender affirming care, including both testosterone and riversedge 20 hrs ago #46

One goal is .....no women. ColoringFool 20 hrs ago #50

a gay heaven then ? WorseDayEver 20 hrs ago #58

He's jealous of ICErs... ananda 20 hrs ago #48

Whoa! Chi67 20 hrs ago #52

While he is screening gay porn films Klarkashton 20 hrs ago #53

Precious Body Fluids no_hypocrisy 20 hrs ago #54

Hegseth has a Comic-Book Mentality tonekat 20 hrs ago #60

This sounds like a test for male porn stars. twodogsbarking 20 hrs ago #62

2 more years cant get here fast enough get rid of all these trumpers FloridaBlues 20 hrs ago #63

Gender affirming care Mz Pip 20 hrs ago #64

Side effects of too much testosterone include: ultralite001 20 hrs ago #65

and Prostate Cancer Auggie 20 hrs ago #69

What is this Fing idiot going to do with men with high testosterone numbers? My guess is he doesn't understand... usaf-vet 20 hrs ago #66

Anybody ask mgardener 20 hrs ago #67

N/T. Bridge TOO FAR. We are in VERY DEEP Orwellian waters. Hope peeps wake the fuck up and revolt. slumcamper 20 hrs ago #68

Such a great reflection of his own inadequacy. efhmc 19 hrs ago #71

I suspect "voluntary" won't be so voluntary in a year jmowreader 19 hrs ago #72

Did someone invest in supplements? Do people have to take it forever once they start testosterone supplements? mahina 19 hrs ago #73

The Manosphere is obsessed with T levels. JFK Jr. is hyped on it. maxsolomon 19 hrs ago #75

After you, Petie Boy! Hope you're not deficient. no_hypocrisy 19 hrs ago #77

He definitely has a thing for gonads! ExtraGriz 19 hrs ago #78

Putting the gone in gonads. They'll be shriveled prunes by the time they leave service. nt Xipe Totec 19 hrs ago #79

And the female soldiers? nt Xipe Totec 19 hrs ago #80

Who would have thought that the "... Great Again"... 70sEraVet 19 hrs ago #81

Serious mental illness. pat_k 19 hrs ago #82

This sure explains a lot about Kegsbreath. Buddyzbuddy 18 hrs ago #85

Nutcase obsessed with nut sacks. Efilroft Sul 17 hrs ago #87

How Hegseth expects US troops to look NickB79 17 hrs ago #88

Why are MAGA so obsessed with genitals and sex and such?! Rabrrrrrr 17 hrs ago #89

Master debaters line WA-03 Democrat 16 hrs ago #91

...says the guy who had to have a hair/makeup room installed at the Pentagon? Drum 16 hrs ago #92

Hedgesuck maliaSmith 16 hrs ago #93

This is about sex discrimination against women. Nothing more, nothing less. valleyrogue 15 hrs ago #94

Hey Kegsbreath! How about a friendly game of CHESS! I can't wait to Fuckin' KICK YOUR ASS !!! BOZO !!! eom Exp 15 hrs ago #95

I thought gender affirming care was bad. Imperialism Inc. 15 hrs ago #96

I hope the failed infantry officer and tabless beyotch Aviation Pro 15 hrs ago #97

Hegseth should be a screened for a deficiency in brain cells. There are many things that have been scientifically proven Martin68 15 hrs ago #98

Just when you thought he couldn't be more stupid Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin 15 hrs ago #99

It used to be a very routine thing for Democrats to be accused of being in favor of tighter state controls in all areas. Janbdwl72 14 hrs ago #100

This country is a complete nut house. Bristlecone 14 hrs ago #101

Too much testosterone I_UndergroundPanther 14 hrs ago #102

Flying drones is brutal and unrelenting Renew Deal 14 hrs ago #103

Wow, and that fuckwit will likely not listen to specialists Warpy 14 hrs ago #104

Ummm, so, if number is low, are they gonna provide 'gender affirming' supplements? Attilatheblond 14 hrs ago #105

Great. LudwigPastorius 13 hrs ago #106

He needs to be tested for brain cells, blood alcohol and STDs relayerbob 12 hrs ago #112

How about a daily sobriety test for Kegsbreath? Crowman2009 12 hrs ago #113

Pile that on for another reason not to enlist! Crowman2009 12 hrs ago #114

Test Hegseth. Iggo 11 hrs ago #115

Does he want to start his own Theban Band? Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin 11 hrs ago #116

Testosterone will rise without alcohol! BidenRocks 9 hrs ago #119

Someone needs to tell him Blumancru 8 hrs ago #120

Kegsbreath must have just seen this 1977 movie, SHOCK WAVES. raccoon 7 hrs ago #121

Whiskey Pete has some serious mental health issues. travelingthrulife 3 hrs ago #123