Bereavement

MLAA

(19,732 posts)

53. Dear Ziggysmom, here is what helped me when my beloved died in October.

Thu Mar 19, 2026, 07:29 PM

13 hrs ago

I found quiet time, closed my eyes and cleared my thoughts. Then I spoke to my husband and walked him through what I felt guilty about (he suffered from hospital dementia and wanted to get out of the bed at the hospital. It was not safe and I tried to prevent him.). I also was questioning myself about what more I could have done (according to multiple Drs there wasn’t more, but that didn’t assuage my guilt.) After speaking to him aloud and calmly walking him through what occurred during his last 48 hours, still with my eyes closed, I felt all the guilt lift and felt his presence and his love. I continue to talk aloud to him and find it extremely comforting.

Sending you kind thoughts and comfort. DM me if you ever want to.

M

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I thought it would get better by now. Husband died 2-6 and I still can't sleep and must force [View all] Ziggysmom 16 hrs ago OP

(((((Hugs)))) applegrove 16 hrs ago #1

Hugs back at you! Ziggysmom 14 hrs ago #22

Wishing you peace for your broken heart 💔 Chat wit us..you may be by yourself but you're not alone 🌺 Deuxcents 16 hrs ago #2

Thank you, wishing for peace for the world. Ziggysmom 14 hrs ago #24

I hope it gets easier for you soon. There is no time frame for grief. LoisB 16 hrs ago #3

I am learning a lot from this forum. Was feeling really low today, but now I Ziggysmom 14 hrs ago #25

I am sorry. I am most certainly no expert and my professional training is not in that area but hlthe2b 16 hrs ago #4

This sounds like it would be very helpful. Joinfortmill 15 hrs ago #9

Thank you for sharing. I'm in Wisconsin waiting for the weather to cooperate so I can get out more. Ziggysmom 14 hrs ago #30

If you are physically up to it, cross country skiing on public golf courses in winter is another hlthe2b 14 hrs ago #32

Understandable blm 16 hrs ago #5

Contact your local hospice for bereavement counseling SheltieLover 16 hrs ago #6

I joined a hospice group when my dad died Tree Lady 14 hrs ago #28

Yes, groups are incredibly powerful! SheltieLover 14 hrs ago #39

It's still very, very early. And grief is very different than depression. I know it's really Scrivener7 16 hrs ago #7

Prayed for you. Grief is painful. Joinfortmill 15 hrs ago #8

Buy a marble cover composition book and journal it out bucolic_frolic 15 hrs ago #10

Thank you. My daughter has polycystic kidney disease and Dr. Bergs keto diet really helps Ziggysmom 14 hrs ago #36

I lost my son a little over 4 years ago crimycarny 15 hrs ago #11

Those two words said it all. GRIEF ILLITERATE. We get three whole days of bereavement leave Ziggysmom 14 hrs ago #41

I swear if I heard "you're so strong" one more time crimycarny 12 hrs ago #59

Second the motion EuterpeThelo 2 min ago #69

Be kind to yourself and give yourself some slack. Grief never just goes away, it just Marie Marie 15 hrs ago #12

I'm so sorry, Ziggysmom. Diamond_Dog 15 hrs ago #13

It's too soon Lulu KC 15 hrs ago #14

Ziggysmom... dlilafae 15 hrs ago #15

When my fiance died suddenly in his early 30s, I walked the same trail every day for a year. femmedem 15 hrs ago #16

Grieve is a journey. traveler50 15 hrs ago #17

It is difficult to move on. A lttle over a month is pretty fast. Fla Dem 15 hrs ago #18

I am so terribly sorry. Trueblue Texan 14 hrs ago #19

DU Hug!!! Ponietz 14 hrs ago #20

I can't even imagine how it feels Tesha 14 hrs ago #21

I almost completely stopped eating for 3 years cpamomfromtexas 14 hrs ago #23

Grief is a very personal process BigmanPigman 14 hrs ago #26

Good thoughts and advice. yellow dahlia 14 hrs ago #37

❤️ underpants 14 hrs ago #27

Its only been about 6 weeks BonnieJW 14 hrs ago #29

Sending a virtual hug Tree Lady 14 hrs ago #31

(((gentle hug))) 🫂 mwmisses4289 14 hrs ago #33

Everything's harder in this environment. yellow dahlia 14 hrs ago #34

Hey Ziggysmom! Once again I realize just how VALUABLE this place is. calimary 14 hrs ago #35

I'd so sorry for your loss kimbutgar 14 hrs ago #38

"" AllaN01Bear 14 hrs ago #40

THANK YOU EVERYONE! Everyone will experience grief in their lifetime. It should not be Ziggysmom 14 hrs ago #42

hitthe2b is right, go outside Figarosmom 14 hrs ago #43

I'm so sorry, Ziggysmom. HeartsCanHope 14 hrs ago #44

Huggggggs, my friend and please be kind and gentle and loving niyad 14 hrs ago #45

Oh my dear Ziggysmom, My heart hurts for you as you are inching your way through this journey that was suddenly thrust KitFox 14 hrs ago #46

My deepest condolences to you. I share Hassler 14 hrs ago #47

I lost my wife of 40 years three years ago. kairos12 13 hrs ago #48

I'm sorry you are going through this Danmel 13 hrs ago #49

I am sorry for what you are gooing through and hope that you find some solace with it all soon. marked50 13 hrs ago #50

I'm so sorry, Ziggysmom... Bayard 13 hrs ago #51

It took me 7 years to feel better synni 13 hrs ago #52

Dear Ziggysmom, here is what helped me when my beloved died in October. MLAA 13 hrs ago #53

.... chowder66 13 hrs ago #54

you're being too hard on yourself Skittles 13 hrs ago #55

I am so sorry. BlueKota 13 hrs ago #56

Two of the very best ways to deal with grief for me, JMCKUSICK 13 hrs ago #57

This community is here for you. Moostache 13 hrs ago #58

{{ Hugs }} EKR's books helped me understand the physical component of grief GreatGazoo 12 hrs ago #60

I'm so sorry, Ziggysmom. highplainsdem 12 hrs ago #61

That's not that long malaise 11 hrs ago #62

Hugs my friend. Dunc 6 hrs ago #63

lost my hubby almost two years ago. SleeplessinSoCal 3 hrs ago #64

it is only a month. give it time. rampartd 1 hr ago #65

Last night I was watching a documentary about Jane Austen mnhtnbb 1 hr ago #66

I hope you find some peace and comfort JoseBalow 1 hr ago #67

Oh, Ziggysmom EuterpeThelo 4 min ago #68