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LetMyPeopleVote

(178,789 posts)
57. Overgrown 12-year-old Kash Patel announces RIDICULOUS new plan to have UFC fighters train FBI agents!
Thu Mar 12, 2026, 03:59 PM
17 hrs ago

This is a stupid stunt




FBI Director Kash Patel just announced the most unserious, clown-show "training" program in law enforcement history: a two-day "historic seminar" with the UFC at the FBI Academy in Quantico on March 15-16.

Agents and senior staff from around the world will now learn "fighting techniques and tactics" from Dana White's professional cage fighters to supposedly "better protect the American people."....

This comes right after Patel shamed himself by crashing the U.S. Men's Olympic hockey team's gold-medal locker room celebration in Italy.

Now he's turning the FBI's elite training facility into a mixed-martial-arts boot camp while the country deals with the consequences of Trump’s already disastrous war with Iran.
The UFC calls it part of the FBI's push for "exciting, innovative training options" to "revamp and improve" preparation.

Excuse me, what the hell does the UFC know about the serious work the FBI is supposed to be doing?

This is beyond unserious; it's just embarrassing. The FBI Director treating Quantico like a UFC tryout gym makes Patel and Trump look like complete idiots who think protecting America means learning how to throw elbows instead of doing actual police work.

While families bury their dead and the economy suffers, the administration is playing fight club with pro wrestlers.

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0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Historically stupid clown show Renew Deal Yesterday #1
Ummm okay. 😳 MustLoveBeagles 23 hrs ago #2
I almost JustAnotherGen 23 hrs ago #3
I wonder who kacekwl 23 hrs ago #4
Will It Be As Much modrepub 21 hrs ago #42
It's so crazy I can't say the words. Diamond_Dog 23 hrs ago #5
When I'm at a loss for words...well..ya got me on this one. BattleRow 20 hrs ago #45
Maybe they can get this guy too... wcmagumba 23 hrs ago #6
Only if "historic" means another silly photo opportunity. nt BootinUp 23 hrs ago #7
The Monosphere is in control - and the results are pre dick table. 617Blue 23 hrs ago #8
I have another name for it. bluescribbler 21 hrs ago #32
Of course he is. Why not? Swede 23 hrs ago #9
How does that find a kidnapped woman? Johonny 23 hrs ago #10
You properly headlock your witnesses? leftstreet 22 hrs ago #19
So, I guess when the FBI agents get the boot they can always Baitball Blogger 23 hrs ago #11
Yeah I'm certain that the FBI has extensive hand-to-hand combat training underpants 21 hrs ago #28
The 11 year-olds are in charge Prairie Gates 23 hrs ago #12
Idiocracy got the timeline wrong. alittlelark 23 hrs ago #13
That's what I said first time I watched it FoxNewsSucks 21 hrs ago #31
These clowns are a national embarrassment malaise 23 hrs ago #14
Every time I see FBI agents... ruet 23 hrs ago #15
This is The Onion, YESSSS??? PLEASE tell me this is The Onion!!! niyad 22 hrs ago #16
How about teaching recruits... LudwigPastorius 22 hrs ago #17
Self-Defence Against Fresh Fruit Gaugamela 22 hrs ago #18
I checked and double checked to see if this was Borowitz (even though I just read today's Borowitz) or the Onion, Amaryllis 22 hrs ago #20
what next? UFC Night live from the White House will become a weekly thing? OGBuzz 22 hrs ago #21
All Circus ThoughtCriminal 22 hrs ago #22
They are going to train bean counters and lawyers to fight UFC style? Jacson6 22 hrs ago #23
Rough times coming at FBI HQ... Buns_of_Fire 19 hrs ago #50
Had to google UFC. Have to do this a lot on DU. Thanks goodness for Goggle. efhmc 22 hrs ago #24
lolol Solly Mack 22 hrs ago #25
New techniques on how to body slam children and law abiding adults Deuxcents 21 hrs ago #26
Why not Lucha Libre wrestling training, too? They could wear those really cool masks! Ocelot II 21 hrs ago #27
What's the current anti-doping policy at the FBI? flvegan 21 hrs ago #29
I can't imagine the FBI folks being stupid enough to think this is interesting. Hope22 21 hrs ago #30
All this UFC manly MMA training isn't going to stop bullets. Crowman2009 21 hrs ago #33
I bet those agents can't wait to have ballsacks in their faces and some fighters have been known to shit their pants. chowder66 21 hrs ago #34
Can't wait for the thumb wrestling tournaments!! chowder66 21 hrs ago #35
I suppose that scrawny bug-eyed twerp thinks UFC is the height of manly manhood, Ocelot II 21 hrs ago #36
What will they charge for 'consulting'? Bobstandard 21 hrs ago #37
ding ding ding, we have a winner! Eugene 7 hrs ago #58
Yes, let's sharpen our tough guy image. pandr32 21 hrs ago #38
Why? C_U_L8R 21 hrs ago #39
Can't wait to see Beef Supreme ... sleroy49 21 hrs ago #40
Just f*ck!ng ridiculous... maspaha 21 hrs ago #41
This maladministration thinks it's a reality television show. LoisB 20 hrs ago #43
Great.... multigraincracker 20 hrs ago #44
Frickin' show fighters Alansworld 20 hrs ago #46
"show fighters" LudwigPastorius 19 hrs ago #48
Seems like there objective is to make it look "good" for tv (assuming you think show fighting is good tv) blue_jay 17 hrs ago #55
Hold someone down and beat them till they tap out? Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin 20 hrs ago #47
Kra$h Partel! Kid Berwyn 19 hrs ago #49
I hope the F.B.I. agents kick their ass. pwb 19 hrs ago #51
This is like a stale lounge act Keepthesoulalive 19 hrs ago #52
;-{).... Goonch 18 hrs ago #53
More dumbfuckery Bristlecone 18 hrs ago #54
They should read some books instead. IcyPeas 17 hrs ago #56
Overgrown 12-year-old Kash Patel announces RIDICULOUS new plan to have UFC fighters train FBI agents! LetMyPeopleVote 17 hrs ago #57
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